Elusive Carrot

I lose a lot of things between the seat and the middle console in my car. I’ll drop a pen and see it stuck there, just out of reach. When I cram my fingers into the gap, they will just graze the object…not enough to actually grasp it. Invariably enough, when I stick my hand down further, I just end up pushing it down further and it eludes me completely. Maddening. 

 

I’ve noticed this tendency in other, more significant, areas in life, as well. Couples having issues conceiving often can’t think of anything but. They see pregnant women or babies and get sad. They pressure themselves and consider various options to get their desired outcome. Yet it remains unattainable. Many of these couples will adopt a child and many of them will suddenly then get pregnant once their desperation has ebbed. Similar incidences have happened with careers, house hunting, relationships and even weight loss.

It’s the energy we bring to situations and life that makes a difference. I could assess every social situation relative on my likelihood to meet a guy. The greater the chance, the more I’d consider attending. The energy I’m bringing is that of desperation to meet The One and, more likely than not, I’ll be disappointed at the end of the night if I didn’t meet someone with whom there was a connection. And if I did meet someone, there is immense pressure to hear from him again. This is the grasping.

Alternatively, I could open my mind and heart and bring positive, loving energy into any social situation I might attend. Not to meet a particular end, but just to have fun, enjoy myself and connect with others. Genuinely. Let go of the clinging and grasping and focus on the moment at hand. What’s there with you rather than what might lie further up the road. This is the letting go. 

In letting go, we choose to engage and experience instead of hoping and wanting. We realize that there is always more in the present than there ever will be in the future because one is real and the other remains in our head. We don’t know what life will serve up to us, what we’ll have to deal with in the next day, much less the rest of our lives. Who knows? Letting that pen fall and focusing on your driving may be the best thing that ever happened to you.